Ask Nicole On How To Get Your Sex Drive Back

Nicole Sanders is the founder and CEO of Ladimax Sports and Fitness, a women’s only gym in Westchester County, New York.

As a celebrity trainer and rehab specialist, Nicole holds licenses in both occupational and massage therapies. A sought-after expert for her knowledge in transforming women’s bodies, Nicole also created the Strength of a Woman workshop and the AQUA self-defense series. Each month she’ll answer readers’ questions about how to stay fit.


How Can I Get My Sexy Back?


Dear Nicole,


I recently turned 40 and suffice it to say, it’s been a fast-moving, downhill slide! At times I feel okay; other times I’m just blah, mostly the latter. My hips have spread, I have fat pockets in areas I never before had to worry about and my energy level has completely dwindled. I eat and drink everything I can get my hands on, until I’m so disgusted, I go on a diet. The problem is, that typically lasts for a couple days and then I’m back to or worse off than I was before. Turning 40 has been a miserable experience for me and I hate what I am becoming. I want to feel sexy again.



Grandma’s Body



Hi Grandma’s Body,


You are not alone at all. As women start to move into what I call the ‘menopausal spectrum’, their bodies begin to experience many hormonal changes. Let’s face it, less estrogen running through the body makes fat your body’s best friend. So I’m going to give you some advice but first, I want you to forget everything you have ever heard about losing weight! Yes, I’m serious. Eat less, burn more, the juice diet, detox this, detox that, weigh yourself daily—all of it, right now, pretend you never heard it. What I’m about to tell you will fly in the face of what you have been told but it works and I have more than two decades of proving it with clients in my business.


With that said, here are my 4 tips for bringing that sexy back!


  1. SWEAT

    Think of how sexy wet skin looks. It glistens and glows. So with that in mind, choose an activity that will get your heart rate up and your body sweating. Whether Zumba, spin class or a boot camp, do something that will have sweat pouring off of you like never before. Really push yourself. There is nothing like accomplishing a physical challenge that requires movement that your body is not accustomed to. Sweat can be sexy. And the release of endorphins will result in a euphoric, “runner’s high” sensation.


    Think of it this way; the feel of running your hands along a body that has strong sensual curves that are supple and firm is sexy. You are going to sculpt your body with exercise and food. You’ve worked hard to sweat, now let’s add some good fuel. Take real stock in what’s in your kitchen. There is no faster path to feeling better than putting the right foods into your body. Dumping the processed, fried, high fat and sugary items will be like lifting a 30-pound weight off your chest and your waist will follow! Part of being sexy is how you feel. As your body begins to detox from all the bad foods, you begin to feel empowered, lighter yet stronger at the same time. You will not be sluggish and your body will move freely…and as sexy as you want it to. 

  3. EAT!


    Okay now this is what I was telling you about. You are going to build a better body, a sexy, lean, strong machine that has others watching with envy. How are you going to do that? This is not the section that tells you to eat less, detox or go on a 1000-calorie diet. Those diets reduce whatever muscle you do have and increase your fat. The number on the scale goes down, not because you have lost fat but instead muscle. So instead of following your normal and dieting, you are going to try this: adopt a plan for clean food. It will consist of lean meats, poultry, fish, green leafy vegetables, sweet potato, quinoa and brown rice. Start eating like this and I promise, you’ll see a difference; your body will begin to lean out. Remember you cleaned out your kitchen to rid yourself of anything other than what is listed here so you are now equipped for success.

  4. CLAIM IT! 

    Now picture what you want your body to become. You want to build a body that has the energy to pull an all-nighter with that special person, is empowered to command any pleasure, is strong enough to handle any challenge coming her way and is comfortable walking with her head held high knowing that she created her own sexy through exercise, eating, and laser focus. Now is time; name it. Claim it. Be as sexy as you want to be!