Amber And Leah’s Parenting Journey: So We Are Going To Have A Baby… Or Are We?

LOTL IVF

Picture this, being pretty much the only lesbian couple (out anyway) in a small country town and realising you have a chance you might be pregnant

Amber had to go buy a pregnancy test from somewhere right? Well she had to go to the chemist and I am sure Amber said she was met with a very confused look by the lovely lady behind the counter. It wasnt the last time we were met with this very same confused stare from anyone who heard the news.

So, Amber is pregnant!? What?! I seriously didn’t believe her when she came bouncing in early that morning to tell me! How on earth do two lesbians manage to get pregnant first try, and some people have to wait so long. Saying we were over the moon would be an understatement.

I looked at the test and could see a faint line indicating we were pregnant. We thought surely not? We needed an experts opinion… was the line dark enough? Are we certain we are reading this correctly? This is where Ambers sister came in? “KELLY?? Please check our pregnancy test… are we pregnant?” She had a look and confirmed yes we were reading BOTH tests correctly (we figured it came in a pack of two, we better be sure)

Amber then made an appointment to the local doctors. We knew we needed a blood test to confirm, but we were fairly certain after taking a couple of home tests. Sure enough we got the results back and YEP we were definitely going to have a little baby!


Next step is to LET THE PARENTS KNOW! We called the parents and close family to tell them the news. They all took it well and I think were just as excited as we were.


Around the 4th week we went over to Exmouth and Coral bay with 3 of our friends. We enjoyed looking around at the shops and doing tourist things. The best moment was while we were looking at cute little surf clothes one of the girls piped up and said ‘I cant wait for you to have a baby, I will buy them all of this stuff’ Amber and I shared a smile at each other when she said that and I will still hold her to that when we do finally get pregnant.

Around the 6th week of the pregnancy Ambers mum came up to visit. We had organised to travel over to Tom Price for our very first ultrasound. We went in and wow how amazing is it to see your baby’s heart beat. Unfortunately the lady conducting the ultrasound was in a mood and it felt a little rushed, but then came a low blow… we asked if we could please have a photo of our precious little baby?  We were told ’I have a plane to catch and there is no more paper left in the machine’ I think Ambers mum wanted to deck her there and then. We never did get a picture, but thought ‘oh well, we will have plenty of other opportunities’

Poor Amber got morning sickness BAD! Pretty much from 6 weeks on she was so sick. She was so sick that she had to tell her boss at work what was going on as she was having to run off to spew quite a few times each day. I remember she wouldn’t be able to eat anything through the day without either vomiting or feeling sick. It would get to around 10 at night and she would finally be able to eat, it was only ever potato chips that would stay down. She was also completely off Pepsi Max, even the sight of the 4 cartons we had at home HAD to go and we ended up giving them to her sister.


Amber also ended up in hospital a few times with migraine and dehydration because of being so sick and vomiting so much.

They almost always gave Amber a shot of maxalon in the butt for the vomiting and panadine forte for the migraine. Amber lost a total of 8kg in 6 weeks of pregnancy.

At the 10th week we started talking about if we should tell everyone or not. I remember we were at softball when Amber decided to tell everyone. I think we had a few more confused looks thrown our way and one lady even asked ‘so how did THAT happen?’ Amber being a smart mouth replied ‘I slept with your husband’ It was the funniest moment and the best facial expression I have ever seen. Amber quickly told her she was kidding and everyone started to get excited for us.

We decided after having the first ultrasound in Tom Price, we would have our next one down in Perth. Better facilities and we would at least get a photo of our baby. Amber was referred to Womens Imaging and we worked it out she would go down at 13 weeks.

My job was so hard to get time off, there was nobody else that could run the before and after school centre. This meant that I would not be able to make it to Perth to see our baby for the second time. We thought that it would be nice to have somebody go with Amber so we asked my older sister to go along with her.

I dropped Amber off at the airport knowing I would see her in a couple of days, and betting she would spend a fortune on baby stuff. I didn’t mind because I was still so excited about it all. Amber was booked in for around 2pm on May 20th 2008. I figured by the time I had done the after school pick up and settled the children, I should get a call from her letting me know how it all went.

It was starting to get a little later in the afternoon and I was wondering why I hadn’t heard from anyone yet. I was sitting in my office deciding if I should call her or maybe my sister or just be patient when I heard the door open. I started to get out of my chair and looked out the window to the office to see Ambers older sister running in with her baby in her arms and tears down her face saying ‘call Amber, she needs you to call her now’

I knew straight away something was wrong and I could barely keep my hands from shaking as I dialled her number instantly choking up.

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