Choosing the Perfect Wine Every Time


Nicole Arseneault

She didn’t know what brand to get, what region to get it from or what year was best. All she knew was that some were red and some were white. But someone, somewhere was listening when a frustrated lesbian panicked after being asked to pick up a bottle of wine for a housewarming party.

Like they fell from the sky, glossy, cute and pocket-size, Chris Geymont and Todd Johnson’s Wine Vintage Cards offer up every essential detail that the neophyte wine consumer needs to know to make a splash at any social or romantic function.

The cards, devoted to wine regions in European and the other to the New World, are convenient and unpretentious; a range of five emoticons demonstrate which wines are excellent and which should be labeled “buyer beware.”  They span a decade (from 1998 to 2007) and cover regions such as the Napa Valley, Southern and Eastern Oregon, Alsace and Tuscany, to name a few.

Born over a glass or two of wine, the cards were meant to be something fun, easy-to-use and helpful in making wine buying a less daunting task for the average person. More specifically, co-creator Chris Geymont says of the lesbian market, “Anyone who takes one of their New World cards to Russian River for the women’s weekend is going to know her way around the area’s best vintages like a pro.”

Hardly word-of-mouth or personal opinion, the data gathered on the cards comes from media reports, publicly available wine ratings, reviews from a variety of sources and firsthand reports from wine regions.
As a side note, all the regions on the cards produce red and white wines; some put out more of one type than the other. For example, contrary to popular belief, there are some delicious white burgundies. Also, a little homework on the part of most amateur wine drinkers can’t hurt. Once you figure out whether you want a red or a white, something crisp or fruity, the wine cards will help you pick out the best vintage and the best year for your hard-earned dollar. (

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