How Green Is Your Sex Life?

A guide to getting sustainable between the sheets.

I drink out of a Klean Kanteen, shop with a canvas bag and walk to work. I even carry bags of milk cartons and soup cans to public recycling dumpsters because my landlord won’t get one for our building.

Yes, I, like so many others, am “going green.” No, you won’t see me taking two-minute showers, using organic deodorant or gardening but I do show my love to the environment.

I’m just more of a get-it-on-with-a-rechargeable-vibrator, use-an-organic-lube, lick-a-vegan-dental-dam kind of girl. I may not have a green thumb, but I certainly have some other green body parts.

Get your sustainable swerve on with the latest in eco-friendly sexcessories. Global warming is the bad kind of hot. Help fight it with the good kind.

The average person throws out eight batteries per year, filling up landfills with hazardous waste that leaches into our soil and water. Not sexy. Battery-free rechargeable vibes bring sexy back with futuristic functions and sleek designs.

Smart Swedish toy designer Lelo’s entire rechargeable line is made from body-safe, forever-durable (and therefore greener) silicone and features sophisticated vibrators, dildos, plugs and rings that prove you can truly have it all—a green product that doesn’t compromise aesthetics, and a pretty sex toy that’s not afraid to get down and dirty for the planet. Greenify your G-spot with the ever-popular GIGI or keep your eco-efforts undercover with the discreet lipstick-disguised MIA that conveniently charges in the USB port of your computer .

JimmyJane, the distinguished company that first had us questioning the term sex “toy” with the Form 6, is now bringing green sex to the masses with their silicone, rechargeable and waterproof “Pleasure to the People” line of aptly named “pleasure objects.” This revolutionizing campaign features three vibrators (the Form 2, Form 3 and recently released Form 4), all of which pair modern earth-conscious technology with no-frills functionality such as ergonomic shapes, multiple speeds and vibration patterns, price-justifying 3-year warranties and even a handy travel lock for the jet-set planet-protector.

Form 2 is a sophisticated version of the popular Rabbit vibrator, with a cotton-tailed inspired two-pronged design that hugs the clitoris (or other external sensitive spot) for what JimmyJane calls “sensation in stereo.” Form 3 keeps the titillating technology advancing with an egg-like shape and a round base that extends into a slim, flexible pad so that when the base is cupped in your palm, the pad acts like a vibrating second-skin to your fingers.
This genius finger-pad yields to the pressure of your fingertips, putting you more in touch with the body so you can hit that special spot without the clumsy guesswork. The newly debuted Form 4 has a round head and a short shaft that make this insertable toy a real G-spot hitter. Flexible but not flimsy, 4 customizes to your curves without caving under internal pressure.

Sex and the City’s Samantha made the Rabbit vibrator with its simultaneous rotating penetration and vibrating bunny ears world famous. Make your floppy-eared fun world-friendly with the Vanity Vr10 Bunny which is made from easy-to-clean silicone, fully rechargeable and specifically designed to titillate more of your terrain with extra-long ears and a thicker, longer shaft (goodvibes.com).

When it comes to eco-friendly insertables, it’s all about materials and NobEssence’s wooden toys may be the greenest in the bunch. Organic, water-proof, hypoallergenic and smoothly shellacked, these earthy rings, dildos, beads and plugs are made from sustainably farmed wood.

Non-porous and easy-to-clean glass and stainless steel are aesthetically gorgeous and 100 percent recyclable. Ultra-slick with a good lube and very durable (no matter how excited you get), people who enjoy more pressure on their points will love glass and steel’s weightiness.

For those who literally like to fight for the planet, check out Angela Riccobono’s Cherry Bombin’ Restraints. Made from reused bike tubing, these cute cuffs are handmade by Riccobono herself with an adjustable, durable over-lapping Velcro design which will fit many sizes without unsafely tightening during a nice, healthy, eco-conscious struggle. Good Vibrations’ Bondage Tape stays around your wrists but out of the trashcan—it sticks to itself, not to skin or (yikes!) other sensitive places so when she finally calls for mercy you can simply roll it back up and use it next time she gets naughty.

The sustainable sex you have is only as good as your lube. The wetter, the better for you. The more organic, the better for the environment.

Sliquid Organic’s all-natural, latex-and toy-safe lubes are all prime planet-saving choices. Blended with certified organic botanicals and ingredients like Aloe Vera, Sliquid gives the eco-erotic even more to get wet about with 100 percent recyclable bottles and partially recycled paper labels.

Developed by female urologist Darlene Gaynor, Valera is a USDA Organic Certified lubricant that gets back to the juicy basics with components like shea butter, sunflower seed oil, coconut oil and flower extracts. Though the all-natural oils do make this particular slippery stuff non-compatible with latex barriers, it may be worth switching to non-latex alternatives for the planet’s (and your body’s) sake

Safer-sex products may be some of the hardest to greenify, but don’t let that be another excuse not to wrap (or cover) it up! Latex gloves are biodegradable and recyclable as medical waste. Glyde condoms, while not recyclable, are vegan, made without the milk proteins found in most other condoms.

This cruelty-free, fair-trade company doesn’t engage in animal testing and sources their latex from owner-operated rubber farms. Make your own dental dams from these conscious condoms: Cut off the tip, cut down one side of the resulting tube so that it unfolds into a solid rectangle, and apply to your favorite lickable body-part.

Being green’s never felt this good.

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