Swim Float or Drown

03/04/10

Golden Girls Party

Two years ago I performed at Murray Hill’s “Miss Lower East Side Pageant.” A performance event that encourages creativity that goes outside the box. I came up with a out-of-this-world character called “A-Squirta-V’Tina”, a drag king who was making their drag queens debut. Why not? The more outrageous the better and enough gender mix-up to spin you on your head.

After that blessed event Sharyn Jackson, the one and only, went clubbing in the east village, costumed and all. No one knew what to do with us, so we thought: “Why not throw a party where we create even more confusion?”

Hence, Victoria, a dress-up party and performance celebrating faux queen-ness, was started born. The first party happened a few months later. The...

Posted at 03:05 PM | Permalink | Comments: 0

03/01/10

Week 1 Challenge—You Down?

Yesterday my friend Lissa, an entrepreneur behind the curtain of TheQueerist.com, called me. She read this blog and because she’s known me for a long time my waffling and indecision confused her. “What’s the problem?” I tried to explain: “I’m anxious about this ‘creating a plan thing’. Remember a year ago, the last time I had a business plan, when I got max five hours of sleep a night? Barely saw my friends and family? I can’t do that again.”

Before a year ago I regularly mapped out my goals but because Catholic education beat guilt into my bones I worked myself into the ground until I completed everything I set out to do. In my mind, not doing everything was akin to not doing...

Posted at 10:47 AM | Permalink | Comments: 0

02/19/10

How Does Snookie Feel?

Yesterday The New York Times featured an article about Fashion Week called “Muscling In on the Front Row.” What was the issue? Well, there was a rumor last week that The Situation, Snookie and friends might grace the fashion world with their presence. Snooty high fashion meets overdone tans and hot pink nails. Worlds collide.

Which makes me think about going to college. I grew up and went to school with The Situation and Snookie prototypes. Imagine for one second being stuck in a classroom with them for twelve years. I practically ran up to Connecticut, clamoring to find a more worldly crowd. But lo, there was an issue. Namely my accent and life experience set me apart and made it hard to blend into Welseyan. My fellow collegiate schoolmates talked about traveling...

Posted at 03:26 PM | Permalink | Comments: 0

02/16/10

Plan of Action

This week I spent looking out for resources to help in my quest to come up with a better plan of action—more sophisticated and pointed than my usual. What I found is that there are a lot of opportunities for actors and artists to spend money (seminars, classes, workshops, more classes) and no clear answers about what works and how. How to go about being successful as an artist is kinda like theorizing about the creation of the universe—there are lots of theories but no one really knows.

Two years ago I collaborated with coach Dyana Valentine—a true master of getting people to do what they say they want to do. One of my favorite things she said to me when I was hesitant to move forward, “What’s your problem?” My kinda language. What I...

Posted at 11:03 AM | Permalink | Comments: 0

02/01/10

Saying Goodbye to an Old Friend

Many of you have come to see me perform my solo show Queens Girl. I have written about it on this blog, it has been written about in magazines and this fall I’ve rewritten the whole darn thing. Kamica said, “Why are you changing it? I like it.” So do a lot of people, but its current state does not match the caliber of show that I want to perform. Performing it around the world caused me to see where the holes are. To go on performing something I know is not as good as it needs to be is well…faking it. And you can’t fake something that takes up a large chunk of your time.

For the show to match my vision, a new-age version of A Bronx Tale and Hedwig and the Angry Inch appreciated by the mainstream masses, I need a new...

Posted at 02:33 PM | Permalink | Comments: 0

01/14/10

Flying Solo

My state of indecision for 2010 has not changed within the past week. Many hours of yoga and some reflection later I’ve still not come up with a plan for 2010. Nothing concrete. No clear wants.

I have rediscovered the glories (and endorphins) of dark chocolate. Especially when made into hot chocolate. A blessed substance.

Twice before when in a similar state of indecision I gave a genius tarot card reader a call. He knew his stuff and it actually helped, in the give-and-take accuracy and trust ratings I give those things. He put the cards on the table, so to speak, about what was going on and what could happen. Nothing I couldn’t figure out on my own, but a nice reminder. Last Monday at 10:30 a.m. I told myself that if within a week I could raise the funds to...

Posted at 10:33 AM | Permalink | Comments: 0

12/18/09

India's Fashion Week

Living in India was the first time that I had no one around telling me what to do or who to be. After college I rebelled from a conservative Republican family by moving to San Francisco. The problem with the Bay Area is that everyone agrees with each other, so there is a lack of critical thinking and serious passion. I went to India and learned something that the liberal mafia nor Howard Beach Italians would never let me admit: it is OK to manipulate the system to get what you want. Here is an old blog post from that time when I was finally was able to put on a corset and get out on the runway. Posted in post-fashion week enthusiasm.

“A friend-of-a-friend in Calcutta is a designer who got into Indian fashion week for the first time. Friends of theirs were going...

Posted at 04:57 PM | Permalink | Comments: 0

12/11/09

Why I’ve Turned Into a Walking Cliche

For those who knew me as I was in the U.S. you know that I always had a three-year plan, if not a five-year life plan. Future plans were not to be fucked with. Mine were always delicately planned and thoroughly researched. Although coming to India might have seemed crazy and irresponsible to some, it was actually an essential part of the 5-year plan to get into public health school and begin working in the public health field.

After 5 months in India something has rubbed off on me. I hate to say it, but I’ve had the cliché ‘come-to-India-and-have-a-life-altering-experience’ experience. It gets me mad, because I routinely make fun of the hippie back-packer types who come to India in search of an ashram, guru, and spiritual enlightenment or life-altering...

Posted at 12:38 PM | Permalink | Comments: 0

12/04/09

To India…Again!

A few years ago I was lucky to receive the William J. Clinton Fellowship for Service in India. I spent a tumultuous, unpredictable year working with an NGO in Bangalore, India. The insanity is summed up by the following facts:

I went to India an indy punk, grubby, non-consumerist, teacher and public service worker.

I left India an aspiring actress and model ready to delve into the commercial entertainment world.

Not the stereotypical travel-to-India-life-changing-journey. Before leaving India I wrote:
“CONCLUSION: IT ALL WAS NOT THAT BAD  Although there were a lot of hard times in India, things ended up working out. I was told that if one at least likes India the country will keep calling you back. The future is uncertain, but I am sure that...

Posted at 03:48 PM | Permalink | Comments: 0

11/27/09

Feeling Inspired

The last thing anyone wants to do the day after Halloween, especially one that fall on a Saturday is to get up at 9 a.m.

By sheer insanity that is what I did last Sunday. Or should I say out of sheer curiosity. November 1st was the NYC Marathon. Now, dedicated marathon-watchers swear by the outstanding nature of this event. Oh, the crowd! Oh, the runners from around the world! Oh, the amazing fantastical energy that is created by everyone coming together to accomplish such an amazingly hard feat!

Hmm…it sounded like a bunch of sentimental ho-hah to me. I wanted to prove them wrong and be the Grinch who was too tired to care. Not that I don’t think running a marathon is worthy of praise, I just like to be Contrary-Mary to my friends who barrage me...

Posted at 12:32 PM | Permalink | Comments: 0

	03/04/10 Golden Girls Party Two years ago I performed at Murray Hill’s “Miss Lower East Side Pageant.” A performance event that encourages creativity that goes outside the box. I came up with a out-of-this-world character called “A-Squirta-V’Tina”, a drag king who was making their drag queens debut. Why not? The more outrageous the better and enough gender mix-up to spin you on your head. After that blessed event Sharyn Jackson, the one and only, went clubbing in the east village, costumed and all. No one knew what to do with us, so we thought: “Why not throw a party where we create even more confusion?” Hence, Victoria, a dress-up party and performance celebrating faux queen-ness, was started born. The first party happened a few months later. The... Posted at 03:05 PM \| Permalink \| Comments: 0
	03/01/10 Week 1 Challenge—You Down? Yesterday my friend Lissa, an entrepreneur behind the curtain of TheQueerist.com, called me. She read this blog and because she’s known me for a long time my waffling and indecision confused her. “What’s the problem?” I tried to explain: “I’m anxious about this ‘creating a plan thing’. Remember a year ago, the last time I had a business plan, when I got max five hours of sleep a night? Barely saw my friends and family? I can’t do that again.” Before a year ago I regularly mapped out my goals but because Catholic education beat guilt into my bones I worked myself into the ground until I completed everything I set out to do. In my mind, not doing everything was akin to not doing... Posted at 10:47 AM \| Permalink \| Comments: 0
	02/19/10 How Does Snookie Feel? Yesterday The New York Times featured an article about Fashion Week called “Muscling In on the Front Row.” What was the issue? Well, there was a rumor last week that The Situation, Snookie and friends might grace the fashion world with their presence. Snooty high fashion meets overdone tans and hot pink nails. Worlds collide. Which makes me think about going to college. I grew up and went to school with The Situation and Snookie prototypes. Imagine for one second being stuck in a classroom with them for twelve years. I practically ran up to Connecticut, clamoring to find a more worldly crowd. But lo, there was an issue. Namely my accent and life experience set me apart and made it hard to blend into Welseyan. My fellow collegiate schoolmates talked about traveling... Posted at 03:26 PM \| Permalink \| Comments: 0
	02/16/10 Plan of Action This week I spent looking out for resources to help in my quest to come up with a better plan of action—more sophisticated and pointed than my usual. What I found is that there are a lot of opportunities for actors and artists to spend money (seminars, classes, workshops, more classes) and no clear answers about what works and how. How to go about being successful as an artist is kinda like theorizing about the creation of the universe—there are lots of theories but no one really knows. Two years ago I collaborated with coach Dyana Valentine—a true master of getting people to do what they say they want to do. One of my favorite things she said to me when I was hesitant to move forward, “What’s your problem?” My kinda language. What I... Posted at 11:03 AM \| Permalink \| Comments: 0
	02/01/10 Saying Goodbye to an Old Friend Many of you have come to see me perform my solo show Queens Girl. I have written about it on this blog, it has been written about in magazines and this fall I’ve rewritten the whole darn thing. Kamica said, “Why are you changing it? I like it.” So do a lot of people, but its current state does not match the caliber of show that I want to perform. Performing it around the world caused me to see where the holes are. To go on performing something I know is not as good as it needs to be is well…faking it. And you can’t fake something that takes up a large chunk of your time. For the show to match my vision, a new-age version of A Bronx Tale and Hedwig and the Angry Inch appreciated by the mainstream masses, I need a new... Posted at 02:33 PM \| Permalink \| Comments: 0
	01/14/10 Flying Solo My state of indecision for 2010 has not changed within the past week. Many hours of yoga and some reflection later I’ve still not come up with a plan for 2010. Nothing concrete. No clear wants. I have rediscovered the glories (and endorphins) of dark chocolate. Especially when made into hot chocolate. A blessed substance. Twice before when in a similar state of indecision I gave a genius tarot card reader a call. He knew his stuff and it actually helped, in the give-and-take accuracy and trust ratings I give those things. He put the cards on the table, so to speak, about what was going on and what could happen. Nothing I couldn’t figure out on my own, but a nice reminder. Last Monday at 10:30 a.m. I told myself that if within a week I could raise the funds to... Posted at 10:33 AM \| Permalink \| Comments: 0
	12/18/09 India's Fashion Week Living in India was the first time that I had no one around telling me what to do or who to be. After college I rebelled from a conservative Republican family by moving to San Francisco. The problem with the Bay Area is that everyone agrees with each other, so there is a lack of critical thinking and serious passion. I went to India and learned something that the liberal mafia nor Howard Beach Italians would never let me admit: it is OK to manipulate the system to get what you want. Here is an old blog post from that time when I was finally was able to put on a corset and get out on the runway. Posted in post-fashion week enthusiasm. “A friend-of-a-friend in Calcutta is a designer who got into Indian fashion week for the first time. Friends of theirs were going... Posted at 04:57 PM \| Permalink \| Comments: 0
	12/11/09 Why I’ve Turned Into a Walking Cliche For those who knew me as I was in the U.S. you know that I always had a three-year plan, if not a five-year life plan. Future plans were not to be fucked with. Mine were always delicately planned and thoroughly researched. Although coming to India might have seemed crazy and irresponsible to some, it was actually an essential part of the 5-year plan to get into public health school and begin working in the public health field. After 5 months in India something has rubbed off on me. I hate to say it, but I’ve had the cliché ‘come-to-India-and-have-a-life-altering-experience’ experience. It gets me mad, because I routinely make fun of the hippie back-packer types who come to India in search of an ashram, guru, and spiritual enlightenment or life-altering... Posted at 12:38 PM \| Permalink \| Comments: 0
	12/04/09 To India…Again! A few years ago I was lucky to receive the William J. Clinton Fellowship for Service in India. I spent a tumultuous, unpredictable year working with an NGO in Bangalore, India. The insanity is summed up by the following facts: I went to India an indy punk, grubby, non-consumerist, teacher and public service worker. I left India an aspiring actress and model ready to delve into the commercial entertainment world. Not the stereotypical travel-to-India-life-changing-journey. Before leaving India I wrote: “CONCLUSION: IT ALL WAS NOT THAT BAD  Although there were a lot of hard times in India, things ended up working out. I was told that if one at least likes India the country will keep calling you back. The future is uncertain, but I am sure that... Posted at 03:48 PM \| Permalink \| Comments: 0
	11/27/09 Feeling Inspired The last thing anyone wants to do the day after Halloween, especially one that fall on a Saturday is to get up at 9 a.m. By sheer insanity that is what I did last Sunday. Or should I say out of sheer curiosity. November 1st was the NYC Marathon. Now, dedicated marathon-watchers swear by the outstanding nature of this event. Oh, the crowd! Oh, the runners from around the world! Oh, the amazing fantastical energy that is created by everyone coming together to accomplish such an amazingly hard feat! Hmm…it sounded like a bunch of sentimental ho-hah to me. I wanted to prove them wrong and be the Grinch who was too tired to care. Not that I don’t think running a marathon is worthy of praise, I just like to be Contrary-Mary to my friends who barrage me... Posted at 12:32 PM \| Permalink \| Comments: 0

Because it's not cute to flounder