Introducing Mr. Mom - A Tomboy’s Adventure as a Stay-at-Home Mom

Lyndsey D'Arcangelo

The first time I realized that I was a little different than other stay-it-at-home moms was when I took my daughter, Maggie, to music class for the first time. She was only four months old, but I wanted to get her out of the house and interacting with other people on a regular basis so that we wouldn’t go stir crazy sitting at home. I also wanted to do things with Maggie that would be fun and beneficial for her growth. So I threw on some grey Nike sweatpants with a white graphic T-shirt over a white long-sleeved waffle shirt, slipped on my white Nike sneakers and left the house in a white baseball cap.

I arrived at music class on time, not really sure what to expect. The music teacher was all smiles and gave me a quick rundown of how the class worked. Then, one by one, other mothers entered the room with their child (or children) in tow. Some of them gave me the once-over, a puzzled expression on their face. I smiled and nodded, letting them see that I did in fact belong there because I had a baby in my arms. Then I plopped down on the floor and waited for the music to begin. The class started and I began to notice that most of the other moms in the class were dressed really nicely. They had on designer jeans, ballet slipper shoes, cardigan sweaters and scarfs. Their hair was also done up as if they were heading out on a date. I looked down in my lap and noticed a large puddle of drool seeping into to my sweatpants, fresh from Maggie’s mouth. I quickly grabbed a burp cloth and sopped it up as best as I could. I wasn’t embarrassed about my outfit, because that’s how I always dressed. I’m a tomboy, so you’ll most likely find me in sneakers, sweatpants (unless I’m going out at night, which hasn’t been a lot lately) and a baseball cap. I didn’t know if these other mom’s felt the need to dress up because they were getting out of the house or if that’s how they normally dressed. All I knew was that we were different. Or rather, I was different.

It’s quite obvious I’m not your average stay-at-home mom. When I’m out with Maggie, people look at me and assume that I’m the birth mother. But I’m not. My wife gave birth to Maggie, not me. I’m more like a stay-at-home dad, only I’m not a man. You could say I’m a lot like Michael Keaton in Mr. Mom. I have no idea what I’m doing and those motherly instincts that all females are supposedly born with don’t exist for me. I have this vision of Maggie when she’s older and her hair is a little bit longer, completely in tangles with me trying to figure out what to do with it. Sigh. I trust that I’ll figure these things out as I go along, but so far every day has been an adventure. And I’ll be writing about it all in this blog, detailing all the ups and downs of my life with Maggie.

As for the rest of music class, it was pretty entertaining overall—for me anyway. Maggie fell asleep not too long after it started. All of the songs were designed to help build and develop cognitive and motor skills in children. I think that if Maggie had been awake, she would have thoroughly enjoyed them.

Lyndsey D'Arcangelo is the author of the Golden Crown Literary Society Award-winning book, The Trouble with Emily Dickinson. She is also the author of The Crabapple Tree and a huge sports fan. Every spring, you'll find her glued to her television for March Madness. When she's not watching ESPN, she's busy working on an upcoming non-fiction book project called, My Story is Out: The High School Experience. For more information, visit lyndseydarcangelo.com.