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Ask The Expert

Relationship column


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Dear Carol,

I have been “out “for about a year now and I am in a very serious loving relationship with someone. They want to meet my family and cannot understand why this is such a problem. I have met their family and they are tired of being left out of all my family celebrations. The problem is I come from a fairly conservative family and haven’t told my parents that I am a lesbian yet. I feel that it is time they knew and I do want them to meet my girlfriend. What approach should I take to share the news with them?

Sincerely,

Uncertain

 

Dear Uncertain,

The coming out process to your family is never easy but; often the fears you have are much worse than the actuality and your family will probably be much more accepting than you think.  You are sharing something very personal with people you love and there is always the fear of rejection and pain.   You are the best judge of when and how to tell your parents as you know them best. Keep it simple and get straight to the point and be confident about the announcement you are making.  Pick an appropriate time to tell them and be patient and prepared for a negative and concerned response. Explain and educate them on your sexual orientation and let them know you are telling them because you want to share this with them and you want them to be part of your life.  Understand they may not know or understand much about this and be prepared to answer their questions and address their concerns. Remember your parents love you too and the most important thing to them is that you are happy and in a healthy loving relationship. Once you have shared this with them you will feel a sense of relief as this is a liberating process and it will give you the ability to be even closer to your loved ones.

Best,

Carol


Carol Sugar-Burke is an Executive Matchmaker for the premier gay and lesbian executive matchmaking firm Bespoke Matchmaking. For more information on Bespoke Matchmaking and to learn about our matchmaking service please click to visit our website, www.bespokematchmaking.com

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